It wasn’t long ago, only a few years, not even, that I was a woman who bounced from crisis to crisis. I would come up against an obstacle or some sense of pain and instead of trying to come up with a solution or even manage my feelings, I would, in fact, create more pain. A poor choice would lead to another poor choice until my life basically consisted of an ugly, nauseating string of poor choices.
I remember, quite a few years ago when my marriage was falling apart, a friend telling my then husband that I was inherently miserable. When I confronted this friend, she didn’t deny saying it. In fact, she made it known that she believed that I was responsible for all of my misery. I was hurt. I was livid. She had no understanding whatsoever about what I was dealing with, who I was dealing with, what was being done to me! How dare she?!? The comments drastically changed the shape of our friendship, and I held a deep resentment for quite some time.
Until, of course, I realized that she was right.